Chapter Fifteen
“In addition to a further breakdown to autonomic motor functions, damage to the cingulate gyrus appears to feed into the aggression we witness with hollows. Even if they sense danger intuitively, they cannot process it.”
–Mother, “Notes on HBRS-15.21”. 6 Years After.
* * *
All things considered, this wasn’t a bad week.
Liam lassoed the last bit of fibers in place and wiped the sweat from his clean-shaven chin. There, another successful project complete. Now his daughter would have a more suitable playpen doubled in size from the first, its boundaries a mix of cushioned bedposts and fibrous netting. Hungry waited patiently for his companion to arrive, his button eyes brightened under the rays of light that spilled in from outside. “Life is good,” his chest still proudly declared, and with this latest invention, it was hard to disagree.
With Evelyn running off to spy on the Beholders and Leah out of town to get reinforcements, Liam had spent his time getting back into his craftsmanship. Back in his Purgatory days, this had been the norm for his survival and general sanity. It was nice to be in the swing of things again. He’d started by making Hungry, but the itch only grew stronger with time. Before Liam knew it, he fixed the oven, the laundry machine, pipes connecting them, and even replaced insulation in the walls where needed.
Chantelle became an invaluable intermediate to the outside world, though everything she brought in always carried a foul, chemical stench. It could not be helped. Everything imported into their little hovel needed to be sterilized before use, especially since his less hygienic roommate preferred thumbs and doorknobs to a pacifier.
Not that Liam minded. The more time available, the more he spread his projects outward. By this point, one of the extra storage rooms had been converted into an entire entertainment complex for Leah, with a deluge of puzzles and play kits built to satiate her budding curiosities.
There was nothing better for him to do either. So, while the others were bogged down combating the Beholders, Liam provided aid in his own little way. So long as his daughter remained calm and happy, what better way could he make a difference?
The solitude did start to weigh on him, however. This was not his first bout of isolation. Liam had spent most of his adult life trapped, with no company save for the memories that had brought him there. Even when he made his heroic escape and worked his way back to the mainland, all he encountered were intelligent undead and not the family he left behind.
It wasn’t until Evelyn that he’d tasted human connection again, but only through the seeds of mutual self-interest. In many ways, Liam and loneliness were still lifelong bedfellows.
And yet, he seemed the only one interested in putting that relationship to rest in favor of greater bonds. His good friend, Leah, cared about nothing more than hiding atop the mountain of sovereignty she had carved from the ruins of this world. Meanwhile, Evelyn wasted no time thrusting herself back into conflict just to ensure the scales were tipped back in their favor. Neither of these women focused on the connections they’d cultivated, instead marching their solo paths in the vain hope of neutralizing every possible threat.
Was life worth living when it was done without companionship? In a bubble of identity divorced from the platonic and romantic, what type of relationships remained?
He kissed his daughter. “I’ve still got you, at least, yeah?”
Leah goggled back, a bubble blowing from her plump lips.
“That’s right. Me and you don’t need to run off and conquer the world together. We can always enjoy the time we’ve been given.”
She started to cry before long. First, a small sob, but it escalated quickly. Liam juggled her around before the acrid scent leaked out from her diaper.
“Ugh,” he grunted. “Again with you? That’s the fifth time today, and I don’t even know where it’s coming from. You’ve barely had an ounce of food today.” He raised the can of crushed lentils to accentuate the point. “What do you have to say to that?”
Leah said nothing, only grimaced in further pain.
“Alright, alright. You drive a hard bargain. But I swear, you’ll do this for me one day, and I’ll be twice as fussy if you keep this up.”
Liam dragged Leah to the bathroom and went through the routine yet again. Perhaps the nicest of all amenities in this place was its cleanliness. Rather than having to clean her up on the bunker floor or in the aura of an open septic toilet, the top of a luxury hotel made for quite the changing pad.
To think how much of this process Liam had missed out on during his younger years. Back when his first family still lived, he lacked the time necessary to babysit his daughter, Lilith. The responsibility had fallen to Nelly alone while he ran around the country. First as a photographer for an advertising company, but eventually as a television survivalist. Oh, what he would trade to go back and live those days differently.
In truth, Liam had squandered that time for his selfish ends and forgotten how much value these shared experiences created. Even if Leah would not remember that he’d cleaned the shit from her legs, he’d never forget the missed opportunity to do the same for Lilith. His poor daughter had grown up in a world without a father, only to have her life cut short when the Hollowing came.
And worst of all, there had never been any closure for them. For all Liam knew, his family was still out there, somewhere…
Don’t dwell on it, he reminded himself. He could not control the events of years long passed. All Liam could manage was the present, with the people he’d come to love. That made his life worth living.
He wrapped up the mess, tossed the used diaper aside, and slid a fresh one into place. Leah beamed back, now satisfied. At least there is no shortage of these. As luck would have it, Asphodel’s shops were replete with diapers, as many rezzers had difficulty controlling their bowels after the Marks they’d sustained.
Liam smiled. “Okay, love, let’s get you back to your friend.”
Hungry remained where he’d been left, his arms wide for a hug. Liam placed his daughter well within reach for her new companion to embrace.
…Only for Leah to crawl the other way, choosing the hand-built drums instead. Her chubby fingers plopped against the layer of packing tape along the rim of the coffee can, producing a sharp beat. She giggled and selected another, this one a recycled PVC pipe that drew a duller thud. Her cackle grew, and she floundered for the wider paint bucket, though her accuracy was less pronounced here. Undaunted, she continued to plop about the options available. Her musical career flew in full swing as the medley of ratta-tat-tas grew.
And Hungry remained in the same place as always. Still silent. Still ready for someone to recognize the truth plastered across his chest. Life is good, Leah. Don’t you forget.
So it was that everyone these days felt compelled to live in their own worlds.
What was Liam to do? He supposed he was as responsible as any for the current state of affairs. The fissure in his relationship with Evelyn had been born in equal part from her withdrawal and his hubris. Even Pandemonium stood as no more than a pause for those woes.
Liam looked again to Hungry and considered his position. Evelyn might have been pushing away from him, but he’d also done nothing to stop her. Too busy living in the past and the present to concern himself with their future. But where would he be without her? When push came to shove, what life would he have now if he lost Evelyn altogether?
Liam breathed deep. He loved Nelly, even to this day. That much he could not deny. But Liam did love Evelyn too. She had fought for so long and gone through so much to reach this point, only to drift further away in her endless pursuit to shoulder all burdens. Even if she found new ways to frustrate him with her struggles, did she not deserve to be loved all the same?
He breathed deep, knowing the answer. So long as Liam chose not to perform his duty as a husband as well as a man, there would be no path forward for the two, but apart. The fate of the world no longer mattered, nor the continued threat against them. Not when Evelyn was still in so much pain.
It was time for Liam to make his own amends.
* * *
The waning light of day fell across Evelyn’s form as she scaled through the back window. Her movements were automatic and cold as always, and her beautiful face remained locked behind the respirator she dared not remove. With the grace and silence of a mouse, she furled up the rope that had worked for her stealthy escape, then closed the black-out curtains behind, waiting for just a moment as she once again scanned the exterior for followers or threats.
Only once again hidden in the dark of their room, did she remove her costume. First, the respirator affixed to her mouth, then the sunglasses over her brown eyes, then the shawl that wrapped around her black hair. She continued, unfastening the clips around her leather hardsuit that protected them from bites and the camouflaged fatigues beneath.
Liam stood from where he’d been waiting on the couch and walked over.
Her eyes flicked his way, hard and calculated as ever. “Managed to get more from Nathaniel today. Should be able t–”
Liam kissed her, his arms wrapping around her form.
She leaned back. “What are you doing, honey? I just got back.”
“Shut up,” he said, planting another kiss. “You don’t have to talk about what happened out there, love. You don’t even have to think. Just relax and let me do the rest.” He hugged her tighter still, once again leaning in for a kiss.
For a moment, Evelyn merely stood frozen in place, her body locked up. But as Liam’s lips mingled again with hers, her muscles relaxed, and she slipped her gloved fingers around his back, sliding for his midsection. He looked into his wife’s eyes and saw tears formed, their brown irises quivering back and forth for fear of surrendering her guard further.
She did not deserve such fear. Not with him.
Liam continued where Evelyn had left off, deftly removing the clips that held her armor in place. One after another, he discarded the ugly, toughened shell that hid her pure form beneath. His lips moved lower, pecking her on the neck where she was exposed.
He did not stop there. Liam proceeded with all the delicacy he could muster, probing deeper with both fingers and tongue.
“Wait… What abou– Ohhhh.” She gasped, Liam now kissing her breast.
He grabbed between her legs, feeling wetness grow. Though Liam still could not yet feel the spark himself, it did not matter. This moment was not for him. It was for her. And as he continued to unravel the wall around his wife, he did not forget that for a second. Massaging the tension from her limbs, biting tenderly where able, and always disrobing her further. It wasn’t long until she was naked completely.
Without more force than needed, Liam brought his wife to the nearest couch and placed her down. Evelyn lay in front, her naked body finally exposed. The scars of her past snaked around her torso, and her dark breasts sagged a beat in the dim light, but that could not concern him in the slightest.
Liam stiffened himself, and he quickly removed his own clothes. Old age coupled with the nature of “the mission” had been a beast for his libido, and it had been a point of contention in their relationship, but the power of raw passion overrode every other sense. Oh, how beautiful Evelyn became when presented in her exposed, unarmored form.
He removed his underwear and climbed on top.
Evelyn cringed a beat. “I haven’t prepared,” she squeaked, referencing their fertility regiment.
Liam knelt low. “Who cares?”
He entered her. The two moaned in shared ecstasy as Liam performed his duty.
This was not sex. It was not procreation. This was love. Together. As a couple. In the most natural sense of the term. The fate of humanity and the burdens of their world were so paltry compared to what they both gained in this moment. Their souls entwined as one, forging the eternal bond they’d established anew. How foolish Liam had been in forgetting why he agreed to marry this woman. Not because the world ended and no other options remained, but because he’d come to love her so deeply after all their time together. He devoted himself to her, and she’d been there for him. Nothing else mattered but the relationship they’d built. Not as mere partners but as equals.
And she did not deserve to shoulder these burdens alone.
Their love eclipsed, and the two reached their climax as one.
Liam rolled over, his body extinguished from the exchange. Evelyn curled back up, calmly sliding a throw blanket over her chest. As quickly as the tryst began, it was over.
“Where the hell did that come from?” she asked.
He exhaled deep. “Been thinking a lot about you, is all, my love. Does it need to be more complicated than that?”
For a moment, his wife said nothing. She merely clung to her blanket, eyes averted from his. So soft and vulnerable. But the faint flicker of a smile across his lips was all Liam needed to see to know that he’d broken through her wall, if only briefly.
“Now you can tell me how this day went, love,” Liam said, making room for the distraction she craved.
“I’ve got a better handle on how the Beholders work,” Evelyn explained, again slipping back into the survivalist. “Nathaniel’s a foot soldier for Aaron, who reports to Abraham.”
“How goes the mind games?”
She beamed. “Good. He corrected himself mid-sentence today, though one of his friends called me ‘Evelyn’ too… It will take some more doing before the Hollowing wipes them of the memory of my name.”
Liam brushed a lock of hair from her cheeks. “As long as you keep yourself safe, they can call you whatever the hell they want. You’re more important to me than them.”
“I know, and thank you. For this. I didn’t know how much I needed it.”
He slid his fingers around hers. “You and me both, love. Not every day can be spent fighting to stay alive. We have to remember who we are and why we’re here. Let’s never forget that. No matter how much we may feel separated.”
Again, Evelyn fell to silence, the shadow over her face. Liam could only speculate the impact this had left on her. She might have been his second chance at love, but he’d always be her first.
“How’s Leah doing?” she asked.
“Put her to sleep an hour ago. We should be good for a few more.”
“I’m gonna look at her for a bit, honey.” She turned to him. “Want to come?”
Liam feigned shock. “I’d say ‘just for you, love,’ but now that you mention it, I’d like to see her too!”
The two walked across their suite, hands locked together.
Whimpering leaked through the walls as they drew near.
Liam grunted. “Not again.” He opened the door, where Leah rolled around in her crib, bawling her eyes out. His nose wrinkled. “And I think she pooped herself too. Can’t she just take a break for a change?”
“How many times has that been?” Evelyn asked.
“Six times today, I’d reckon.”
“But she still hasn’t been eating?”
Liam groaned. “Afraid not. At this rate, Chantelle’s will have to get more diapers than food, yeah?”
But Evelyn watched on in silence, her brow furrowed as she studied their daughter. Without saying a word, she rushed across the room and pressed her palm against Leah’s forehead. The color flooded from her face.
“Liam, come here!” she ordered.
He closed in without question, the hairs raising on the back of his neck. His palm met hers on their daughter’s forehead while she rolled around and cried. His heart skipped a beat, and he locked eyes with his wife. No more words were needed.
Leah had a fever.
Oh, sure, a baby’s cold was the type of matter that no adult overlooked. Liam had once abandoned an episode in the Everglades mid-shoot after hearing that Lilith was in the hospital with a cough that wouldn’t go away. To have this level of concern was natural for any loving parent.
However, that fear came from an era where children had access to modern medicine. The days of pressing a button on the phone and having them air-dropped in were long since gone, and the anatomy of a rezzer relied on a completely different set of chemicals and reagents to function, so none could be found here.
Divorced from the amenities that Liam and Evelyn grew up with, reality became far starker for the future. Even if they ruled out the Hollowing, there was no denying where this could easily go.
Leah would perish if this illness went untreated.
